🕜 Ticktock. Your Life Is Passing You By.
Sorry to hit you up with that. But don't worry, I've got a way to help you make the most of every day.
Happy Thursday,
I hope your week has been going well and you’ve got a great weekend ahead of you.
No, this isn’t a draft sent by accident - I did that to make a point - about pleasantries. You know, the awkward openers such as… how have you been/wow, what about this weather/where has the year gone…
Personally, I think we spend way too much time thinking about what pleasantries to add to our messaging, when we all know we really just want to get to the point. I’ve always felt this way on a cellular level, but never really did anything about it until my sister-in-law Sue sent me an email that looked like this:
Hey Abbey -
Pleasantry, pleasantry.
What do you want me to bring for Xmas Eve?
Pleasantry, pleasantry.
Love,
Sue
At this point, some of you might be thinking, “Didn’t Abbey write about this before?” Yes, it’s true - I did share the pleasantry, pleasantry story in a previous email (read it here).
But I had to share the concept again, because I think it’s pure genius. From the moment I opened Sue’s email, we made a pact - when emailing, we could skip the chit-chat and get to the point.
As time went on, I started to wonder how I could apply the pleasantry pleasantry concept to other areas of my life - so as to not waste time and brain power.
In the process, I realized there were many things
I was spending way too much time on…
and subsequently wasting precious moments of my life.
Such as:
taking 45 minutes to write the “perfect” email/inquiry/invite to a client/employer/friend.
spending way too much time on decisions like… what YouTube video should I play while I cook, what podcast should I listen to on a run, or what Netflix show should we watch tonight.
overthinking a text reply that should take ten seconds. (And giving the receiver unnecessary anxiety with the elusive 💬 …💬…💬)
These examples made me realize the following:
I’ve been wasting a lot of precious time making decisions.
To illustrate this, a story.
As a travel and golf writer, I look for all possible ways to make new connections. One way I do this is through conferences.
Unfortunately, as I looked at the possibilities for 2025, I learned that the two conferences that would help me the most - The PGA Show and TravMedia’s International Media Marketplace (IMM) - are scheduled the same week.
Upon learning this, I blocked off my calendar so I’d have the two-three week block I’d need…to make my decision.🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
I went deep into it… carefully weighing the pros and cons of attending each.
I asked my husband what he thought.
I emailed fellow writers for their input.
I asked the lady behind me in Target what she’d do. (Okay, I didn’t, but I’m not going to say I didn’t consider asking.)
I added the Psychic Hotline to my contacts and ordered a 🔮 from Amazon.
(Yes, of course Amazon has them.)
I even researched attending both conferences and looked into a multi-city (Home- Orlando - NYC - Home) flight package.
And for a hot minute, I actually considered doing both.
Then one of my writer friends said, “Unless you’re rich, not sure how you’ll swing that.”
So I came back down to 🌎.
And asked someone who not only knows the industry inside and out, she also knows my goals and specialties well.
She told me, “Normally, it takes me a long time to decide on things like this. But my immediate, very strong thought is that you should go to The PGA Show this year and IMM next year.”
BAM.
That was it! Brilliant!
I told my husband my decision as I knew he’d be glad to know I wouldn’t be running new scenarios past him every five seconds.
He replied, “Good. Now go book your flight. And…don’t look back.”
And wouldn’t you know, this whole experience leads to What I’d Rather Be Talking About this week:
Why do we waste so much time deciding things?
I mean, really.
Think about all the decisions you ponder and ask yourself…
Is all of this time spent dwelling on decisions the best use of my time?
Because when it comes down to it, it (as in life) is about time.
We can spend four hours deciding what to say in an email, or we can spend four minutes and then go get some #$@% done.
We can research four different trip options, or we can settle on one and then go enjoy that rip.
And don’t even get me started on those little, insignificant decisions we sometimes get caught up in - from dinner to nail color. (Sometimes I have to remind myself, “You’re getting your toenails painted, not choosing a college. MAKE. A. CHOICE.”)
Do you understand what I’m saying?
Isn’t it time we spend less time on decisions and more time on life?
To help drive home the point, here’s why being wishy-washy is wasting your mental energy and here’s how to finally overcome The Curse of Indecision. You can hit those resources, or you can just decide once and for all that you’re going to make better decisions.
Maybe give yourself some guidelines - like take 1 minute to decide dinner; a week for a vacation. I don’t know - just establish some parameters to help you stop wishy-washing your life away.
Once and for all.
And with that.
Pleasantry, pleasantry.
Enjoy the links below.
Abbey
If you’re feeling indecision, maybe it’s due to brain fog. Inflammation is likely the culprit - learn how to fix it on the Dhru Purohit Show.
When it comes down to it, maybe it’s time to just DO THE THING YOU’VE BEEN OVERTHINKING. That’s what my favorite newsletter writer Laura Belgray says. Here’s how you do it.
One place I spend a lot of time overthinking my day away is my closet. If this is also you, here’s how to look more expensive when you’re not a trust fund baby or trophy wife, or why not work with your existing wardrobe and see what color combos look most elegant, sophisticated, and expensive.
Watch this if you want to reflect on life, nature and our purpose here on Earth.
